4.26.2017

new moon / april







NEW MOON





Pink Moon
Wednesday, April 26th, Taurus, 5:16 am PST

Two things I want to talk about this month during our pink new moon!

The first is something called "the maze". Maybe it is all the retrogrades we have had, maybe it is just the times and energy we are living in, but lately I have have my eyes and ears open to the ways I get stuck, and I have seen it in everyone I encounter and talk to, including friends and clients. What is the maze? The maze is exactly that, an internal structure that is being used to keep you stuck, in a loop, and in a pattern. When we get thrown into it by triggers in life it derails us from growth and overcoming an obstacle (either within or in front of us). It has been intelligently designed by the psyche to use the part of you that will keep fighting for growth, this part of you has integrity and such good intentions to fight and overcome what is blocking it, sometimes known as the dark - and when I say the dark, I mean both the darkness within but also the darkness in others and in the world. It is this dark aspect that has built the perfect maze for each of us to get stuck in. Every person's maze is different, and every person's triggers are different that land you in your own maze. And trust me when I say - everyone right now is in their maze. How do you overcome it and get yourself out? Stay tuned. But, until then just watch the for the triggers that set you off and put you into a pattern where you are disempowered. This could be a kind of pattern you recognize in yourself when it comes to relationships, conflicts, anger, love, work, health, intimacy, sex... the pattern is the same in all of these places, but there might be one where you can identify it more easily. But know that the pattern and loop of the maze applies to all situations. It can be helpful to be sensitive to the energy that feels like it repeats itself, a series of steps that is like a loop, these are the steps of your maze, the steps that are on repeat to ensure that you never overcome. Something like: A happens, then I feel B, then I do C, then I feel D... and then I am back at A again. They can be doing, thinking, or feeling steps. See if you can spot it during this new moon. 

So many amazing things seem to be happening for so many people, and yet they are experiencing it all from inside their maze. The first step to overcoming it is to just catch the pattern and when you are landing in it. 


Now on to this Taurus energy we are in for this new moon. There will be a natural time of slowing down. You will feel moments where you have some space to gain clarity about what direction you are heading and what is important to you during this moment of your life. Taurus is ruled by the heart and the planet of Venus. It is very down to earth and grounded, and loves the sensuousness of the physical world and all the pleasures it holds. While we will have moments available to us that will bring great clarity about the direction we are headed and the future we wish to have, this Taurus energy is needed to help build the foundation that will help us to get there - the ground beneath your feet. Think about what you value and what you honor, especial things in the physical world and about the body. Taurus also rules the throat and the voice. So now is a great time to be clearing energy there and owning the power that is held there. It's a great time to strengthen the connection between the heart and the voice, allowing your words to speak the wisdom of the heart and to be the voice of the heart. This moon is an opening to be living the beauty, strength and creativity that is inside us and to celebrate and enjoy those same things in the world around us.








4.11.2017

mineral meditation







Please join me on Earth Day for a Breathwork Meditation.

This is part of a series of Mineral Meditations. This month we will focus on CHRYSOCOLLA. 
You will get a mineral of your own to work with and take home with you. During the circle we will talk all about this very special mineral: how to clean and care for it, you'll learn about its specific energy and properties, and you will get the opportunity to experience its healing qualities during our meditation. 

Saturday, April 22nd
10:30 am - 12:45 pm
Venice, CA
$50

The location will be emailed to you when you RSVP.
Space is limited / To reserve your space please email :
lauren@fieldsofstudy.com





4.10.2017

april / full moon








FULL MOON





Egg Moon
Monday, April 10th, Libra, 11:08 pm PST

With this Full Moon in particular the most important thing is to connect on a visual level with the energy the moon is offering to you. Go outside and find the moon (there are plenty of apps that can help you locate it in the sky). Spend some time just looking, and absorbing into your eyes the light and energy of this moon. There are messages in its light that can be received through your eyes. Listen to what it has to tell you about giving and receiving, about moving in cycles, about the receptivity of the female within us all. Open your arms to it. Let it be a celestial body for worship and devotion. Let it awaken in you a connection to what is sacred about your heart and your energy.

The more you can give yourself over to the energy of the moon the more grounded you will be this month. There are lots of energies at play, including five planets in retrograde by the end of the month. Retrogrades push a lot of energy forward, which means that to break out of the mold some things will have to fall apart. When things break apart hidden wisdom can surface. Open yourself up to this process and try not to control or resist. I know this is hard to do, but see if you can catch yourself when you are controlling, or resisting, or in fear - all of which stop the natural process and unfolding of energy or they just make it way more difficult than it needs to be. Life isn't about being perfect and not having weak spots or blind spots. But, it is about learning what they are, catching them when you are in them, and then making a choice that counteracts that habitual impulse that trips you up. Retrograde energy feels like a spiraling back, so you might feel old stuff is coming up, or that you are being hit over and over with the same thing. The good thing about this is you will have plenty of opportunities to make a different choice if you don't get it right the first time. In life mastery isn't about being in anticipation, it is about being in the moment, and asking yourself in each moment how to take the next step that will allow you to evolve beyond the known. 

There is a lot of Air energy happening this month, which will help you have perspective and be able to see the bigger picture, but don't let it take you out of the moment. There will be lots of highs and lows, clarity and confusion, ease and difficulty, etc... everything is intense this month. Lots of growing pains. But, keep connecting with the energy of the moon, it will help you open up and be more receptive. And be forgiving with yourself and others, support yourself and each other. It's an unstable and difficult time.

So much healing is possible right now, it is really an incredible time to be alive!






Brancusi

3.28.2017

new moon / march







NEW MOON




Crow Moon
Monday, March 28th, Aries, 7:58 pm PST

The message has been coming loud and clear - GROUNDING.  I have had many conversations with friends, clients, in meditation class, etc... about the importance of grounding. It's a word we hear a lot these days, and use a lot ourselves, but have we stopped and asked ourselves and each other what we really mean when we say the word grounding? To me, grounding is one of the most important principals when it comes to being human, or spiritual, and yet most everybody I know is so disconnected from their bodies (and even more so in the spiritual community). Being grounded is important because we are human, and we have bodies, and we need to be connected to them. If we don't have a connection to our bodies, how will we be able to access our own feelings? And if we aren't connected to our own feelings, how will we be able to express ourselves in an authentic and truthful way? And if we are a sensitive person, how will we be able to know what is our feeling and what is a feeling of another that we are just picking up on? All important questions, and the answer to all of them is - you guessed it... grounding. 

To be grounded is to be connected to our bodies. And this might sound easier than it really is. It often takes a lot of practice. Most of us have fear about being connected to the body because our body is part of nature and that means it holds both light and dark. And to be connected to the body means we must encounter our dark. And for some it is even hard to accept that there is darkness at all. This is part of why the spiritual world can be a bit hard to navigate at times. Because most of that work is about the light! Which is amazing, and makes us feel amazing, but it doesn't include the full picture of being human. And when that darkness is repressed it can come out in some pretty icky ways. Being grounded in the body is amazing because it allows you to connect to that light that feels so good and expansive, but to bring it into the body (not only is this empowering but this is part of how we find wholeness), instead of leaving the body to connect to it outside of ourselves. 

So this month, practice staying in the body. Connecting to all feelings. Watching what things trigger you to pop out. Or what events or people or places make you feel grounded AND ungrounded. Ways to work on grounding are connecting to nature, and the biggest way is to move your body. Moving the body puts you in the body right away. Dance is my favorite way, but there are others.

With this new moon in Aries it's a perfect time to MOVE! That is what this energy is all about these next two weeks. Aries wants adventure, spontaneity, stimulation, movement, and expression of the self out in the world! Aries also wants something to bump up against. So, if you are bumping and resisting, that's not gonna feel great. Just know that the bumps are there to create movement, and change! Go with it!







3.21.2017

sans






So excited to have done an interview with Sans Ceuticals (one of my favorite beauty lines).
Talking about the importance of criticality, swimming and intention.

Read the whole thing here
Thank you Sans and Yasmine!




On analysing or critiquing one's own work:

I think being critical is one of the big things Graduate School teaches you. I always resisted it when I was in school, I found it so stifling. Now, with some distance, I really see it’s lasting effect on me. For better and worse, it is a part how I see and do everything. I think it often makes me really hard on things I see people making out in the world. But, I also see how it helps me to consider and push my own work.

Criticality is important, it’s something I think we are loosing as a flourishing, creative culture. I think when we make something we ought to know what it’s saying and doing in the world beyond being an act of expression, or something of beauty. If you are an artist you have to understand the context in which you are making something. It’s important to look at things with a critical eye. It’s how we make meaning and understand the world. It’s how we hold people accountable to the things they make, and say, and do. And, more importantly, it’s how we hold ourselves accountable for the mark we are leaving on the world with our creations.

Criticality is what helps us see beyond the aesthetics of something. And while I think beauty is important it can sometimes be a dead end and can keep you on the surface of something, which, in the end, isn’t that interesting to me. Beauty isn’t important if I can’t move beyond it to go deeper.

We are living in an interesting time where so many people are makers, calling themselves artists and curators. More so than ever before. It makes me want to hold tight to some sort of criticality. Perhaps this is antiquated of me. And who knows, maybe in forty years I will have come to see that as artists it’s not our job to be critical and all we need to do is just make the art. But, I doubt it. I think as artists we have a responsibility.






photo by Yasmine Ganley

3.16.2017

from around









- How does it feel? Patti Smith sings Dylan

- Proust, caught on film


- (this is a little dated... that's how long I have been working on this "From Around" post, but interesting none the less) A reflection of how behind the times America is when it comes to equality of the sexes in politics and positions of influence and power.

- Anthroposophy

- I am pretty much in love with everything Sans. I remember the moment I used their products in the shower, smelling them was the first time a product has made me feel like a woman. I can't recommend them enough. My two favorites are the - Hair + Body + Face Oil and the Body Exfoliant (that I actually use on my face, too). If you live in LA Passenger now carries it, which I am so excited about. 

- An Era for Women Artists? Incredible. A must read.

The Getty Research Institute announced the acquisition of Joanie 4 Jackie, a large, feminist collection of short movies and video art distributed as "Chainletter Tape" compilations by Miranda July in the ‘90s and 2000s.

- take a look at my bff, Claire Cottrell's amazing photos from the Women's March here in LA. And watch Zoe Ghertner's film from the march. Also, I started a new Instagram feed with a few women friends - with ideas, inspiration and news about activism - follow @ohyeswewill

- such a fan of Matt Paweski - we went to school together - check out his show

- a lovely portrait of my friend Caren and her husband Adam on FvF, by Claire

- wildflowers are in bloom in LA - stay up to date with the Wildflower Hotline

- a museum of the world's rarest colors - one of my dream jobs would be working here - sent to me by my friend Matthew Feyld

- Yvonne Rainer's film "The Man Who Envied Women" - this film BLEW MY MIND - I can't stop thinking about it.


watch
Singing in the Rain
Young Americans
The Shorty George
Gloria Steinem
Into the Inferno
Training at Teatr-Laboratorium, 1972

listen
to John Lewis
Alain de Botton
Show up, Dive in, Stay at it
2. Andante (Adagio)
I Lie
Shisen
Silver Morning
Arabian Fantasy

see
Ron Nagle
The Art of Alchemy
Vija Celmins

read
Every Night the Trees Disappear
Autobiography of Red

eat
Baroo

use
Oblique Strategies
Uusi's tarot deck
lepidolite
In Love





obsessed with Daniel Buren these days 

3.12.2017

full moon / march







FULL MOON





Sap Moon 
Sunday, March 12th, Virgo, 7:54 am PST

Energetically, full moons are the most intense periods of the month. Part of this is because the sun and moon are in opposing signs, it can often feel like we are being pulled in two different directions, or swinging from one side of the pendulum to the other. I feel this a lot right now as we enter into the height of our full moon in Virgo with the sun in Pisces. This is a time of really learning to balance action and receptivity, really knowing when to be out in the world and when to be alone or resting, when to be moving and when to be still. 

For the last year or so time has been doing all sorts of nutty things. For one, it is collapsing. This means that we can feel more easily into the future, we are all becoming more psychic and intuitive (these are also strengths of Pisces). On the flip side it allows things from the past to surface and be cleared more easily. And it also is causing time to speed up, so things that it might take us lifetimes to heal previously we can do so so much faster. So, all of this might make you feel like a lot is being thrown your way, or pulled in all different directions, or just plain old confused.

It is important to be taking some solo contemplative walks / hikes or be in meditation this month. Because all of this is happening, and because we have the moon in the active sign of Virgo and the sun in the receptive sign of Pisces, we need to really discern what's going on and what to do about it. Because Pisces just increases our sensitivity and psychic senses the best way to start to understand what is yours and what is someone else's is to spend time in your own energy. Really get to know it. Be in your body (the best way to do this is through movement). Create a container for your energy. Being in your body and being grounded is the only way when you are out in the world and you are struck with or absorbing different energies you will know if it is yours or someone else's. This takes practice. So, start to practice now. The energies of the sun and moon and other planets are supporting this.

This solo time will also give you more space to get clear about what is important, what direction to move in, and connect to the guidance that is available to you. Spending some solo time will help you be more clear about how to move into the world from the truth in your being and what action(s) to take. Venus has also begun her retrograde, so this will help in any exploration of your values and pleasures. Venus reminds us that when we heal the personal we heal the collective.

This Virgo Moon can help you be thorough in your contemplation and listening. It's also a great time to get organized, on a more practical level. There is no coincidence to the term "spring cleaning". Virgo energy is great for sorting through things on a more base and rational level. We are also coming out of the winter months, and with the time change and blossoms blooming it's a good time to do any kind of spring cleaning that you feel called to do. We are also in a natural time of letting go as the moon transitions from full to new, letting go of more and more light in each moment.

Be still. Feel. Listen. Get clear. Make a plan. Take action.








MEL BOCHNER: Meditation on the Theorem of Pythagoras, 1972. Hazelnuts and chalk on floor. 17 x 16 in. (43.18 x 40.64 cm)

3.03.2017

10 day breathwork meditation challenge






10 Day Breathwork Meditation Challenge


This is an online workshop that will be 10 days of different topics that will help you focus on various aspects of what the breathwork can bring up and how it can be a tool for you in your daily life.

This series of meditations will specifically focus on the eight chakras or energy centers in the subtle body. With your own breath you will learn to have a deeper connection to the energies that are held in your body.

You will have access to musical and guided meditations of 15, 20 and 30 min in length that you will do on your own at home. You will also receive the support of a community from all over the globe, as well as share and ask questions of each other and me about your experience. A perfect opportunity if you live outside of Los Angeles, have been wanting to try to do the meditation at home, or if you are ready to deepen your meditation practice. The energy of the new year is starting to kick in. See just how much can shift in your life in ten days. 


March 25th to April 4th
$40


to sign up please email: lauren@fieldsofstudy.com

( sign up ends on March 23rd )





photos by Claire Cottrell

2.26.2017

new moon / february







NEW MOON




Hunger Moon
Sunday, February 26th, Pisces, 6:58 am PST

We are always in a time of transition, but especially during eclipses! It is our second one this month and they always bring about great change and push us into a new energy. I keep seeing in my mind's eye the way a giant wave builds, crests, and then crashes back into itself, only to recycle the water to create yet another wave, and another, and another... There is something about this time that is moving our energy like this. Lots of people are talking about this being a time of changes, and endings and new beginnings. But, where does that energy go that belongs to the things that are ending, the things we are letting go of? I think this time is about recycling that energy. You might have felt in the last week like you are being pulled back into an old pattern, a familiar place that you thought you had left long ago. But, think about it in terms of the ocean, the way the water retreats back along the sandy beach, pulling back to gather more strength and momentum to move forward. I keep thinking about the qualities of black tourmaline as well, the master of recycling energy. It can transform what is unhelpful, harmful, draining, old into something new! Use the imagery of the wave like a map, a way to understand what is happening in your life right now. And use the energy of black tourmaline to help you recycle.

Our Sun and Moon are both in the sensitive, loving, intuitive sign of Pisces. New Moons are naturally times of new beginnings as the moon in void of light and starts it's two week period of gathering more and more light to become full. Think about the things you wish to gather - What you are ready to pull in? With all this Pisces energy we are supported to slow down and open our hearts more. There is an opportunity for forgiveness. Pisces has a tremendous ability for connection. As we transition out of the universal (sometimes detached) quality of the Aquarius we move into the more personal connections of the Pisces. This sign has an intense level of sensitivity, this sign uses the way it feels to understand others, with a deep level of compassion. There is also an opportunity with this sign to connect to unseen worlds and energies. Pisces are very telepathic, intuitive and poetic in their nature.

Use this time to slow down, find joys that might be subtle but deep, open your heart with forgiveness and compassion, deepen your personal connections to your inner self, to others, to the unseen. Use your heightened sensitivity from this Pisces moon to slowly reveal to you a new path, or something you have been overlooking. Things are changing, and we must have more than our eyes and ears open. 

Don't forget to make your New Moon wishes!







photo of my grandmother's abalone shell

2.16.2017

in vogue










Check out my mineral recommendations for New York Fashion Week over at Vogue!
Scroll down to #11 - If all else fails, try crystals

Pyrite, purple fluorite, black tourmaline, and danburite.




2.12.2017

full moon // february








FULL MOON





Hunger Moon
Friday, February 10th, Leo, 4:33 pm PST

Get hungry! This is a time all about tapping into the truth of what your heart really wants. With our Full Moon in the sign of Leo we are in the energy of the full, courageous, passionate heart. The heart that is fearless! With other star and planetary alignments happening in the sky, as well as the lunar eclipse we are being given full permission to seek what lies in our heart, to discover what it longs for and what it can create, how it can express and how it can love fully! This last week or so I have been feeling the urge and getting signs through conversations with friends that it's time to sit down and really spend some time thinking about what it is I want in my life. What am I working towards? Since the new year I have felt a bit untethered and disconnected from where my eyes are looking. Feeling like I'm not as clear about what it is that I am working towards, or just not specific enough, and too consumed with focusing on the daily tasks, work, lessons and joys of living. Conversely, my focus has also been concentrated on things that are about a scope of time that is huge, like since the creation of my soul. Ha! So, on one hand I am living from a place so zoomed out with so much perspective, and then zoomed so far into the daily to-do's. I am longing for that middle ground. 

That is what I will be spending some time doing, and what I encourage you to do as well. Spend some time, even a few days thinking about, writing about, drawing about... your life. Your work and your relationships, your home, your success, your growth, your health, your family... I am really into this new idea (for me) of creating a life where I am moving towards something but in an open way where I am also discovering and creating as I am moving, not just focused on the goal in a way where it leaves no room for anything else to come in. I want getting to my goals to feel more creative. A little like being an artist, actually. With this moon, and the stars and the planets, this is a perfect time to be thinking about the future and what you want to create. With the Sun in Aquarius it lets us see the big picture, to have the vision, and then with the Moon in Leo we get to engage and create this vision from the truth that is in our heart.

We also have a certain alignment in the cosmos that might be bringing up some old wounds or feelings of not feeling supported. So if that is coming up for you, or comes up for you around creating in your life don't be surprised. That is coming up to be healed.

Happy creating of your life!










2.09.2017

minerals for winter








Back in December I had the honor of writing a little something about minerals for my friend Caren, who is so lovely. She is an acupuncturist and has the beautiful healing space and shop in Eagle Rock, Window of the Sky. Check it out if you haven't already. It is full of treasures for lifting your spirit. And when you are in there pick up a copy of her zine on the element of Water, where you will find this mineral info and so much more!





MINERALS for WINTER

The number one mineral I would recommend for the Winter season is LABRADORITE. This stone is all about magic! Don’t be fooled by its dark outer appearance, this stone holds a rainbow of brilliant hues as it catches the light. This is a great stone for assistance as you move through the darkness, the void, the unconscious, and the unknown of life. It helps illuminate the truth while protecting you as you traverse into unseen worlds. It strengthens your intuition and enhances your particular psychic abilities. Perfect for moving through these darker, winter months; helping you to go within, find the magic, and bringing the light.



OTHER HELPERS:

MALACHITE - to help surface energy and deep emotion stuck in the body. Energy can get stuck, and when we hold on to it it can cause anxiety, tension, stress and even fear. This stone will help draw that up and out, allowing it to pass through your loving and compassionate heart.

ROSE QUARTZ - known to be a stone all about the heart, gentleness, relationships and love. But, this is also a great stone that can help you during the winter months to support your kidney function. By opening the heart center it allows for a release of stress, tension, and heartache, while supporting the kidneys and adrenal glands. 

APATITE - especially of the blue / green variety, will help during this season as things are darker, more heavy, and as fear is present. It will help you to transform your despair into hope, and your fear into courage. 

PICTURE JASPER - to reveal hidden thoughts, griefs, and fears so they can be seen and healed. This stone holds a hidden message or picture from the past that can help you on your journey of growth. What we fear and repress in ourselves can be a gateway for profound healing.

APACHE TEARS - for helping you feel safe to express emotions that you are holding, or that might be uncomfortable to feel. It is perfect for supporting you during any kind of grieving; grief that is current and even old grieving you have yet to do.


COPPER - is an excellent conductor of energy. It's an enhancer. And is also known as the lucky metal. This would be great to aid in circulation issues or to stimulate the flow of energy. Perfect for colder temps when your energy can get a little stuck from not moving enough and not enough heat and sun, and your emotions can tend freeze up as well. 








2.06.2017

association







recipe inspired by the last place you traveled: back in time, a memory of eating lunch at Da Adolfo in Positano. Mozzarella grilled on lemon leaves. Main ingredients: best friend, sea salted hair, sun kissed skin, music from an old boombox, Italian men, and not a care in the world.  


sign: Scorpio


childhood memory: the summer of 1989 - Madonna’s "Express Yourself", Cindy Crawford, Betty Boop and other ideas about womanhood, opals, swatch watches, Keith Harring posters, pool chlorine and sun bleached hair, neon, United Colors of Benetton everything, jumping off a horse in Wyoming, first hearing the Grateful Dead. 


line from favorite song or book: "A natural beauty should be preserved like a monument to nature." - Neil Young


morning or night routine: a huge jar of hot water with lemon, a spoonful of chyawanprash, one vial of 3.3 quintessential seawater, ashwagandha and cordyceps mixed into my coconut yogurt, half an avocado with pink sea salt and olive oil, deep breaths, trying to get out the door to the studio, but too many emails. 





I got to do a little interview for TIDE. 

Thank you Jen & Association









photos from the Amalfi coast, summer 2014

1.27.2017

new moon // january








NEW MOON






Wolf Moon 
Friday, January 27th, Aquarius, 4:07 pm PST

Full steam ahead - some are saying. But, I have to say, I don't feel it yet. I think come March we will really be feeling the momentum and forward movement of this new year. Right now it's about getting ready. I think we can use this Aquarian energy with the Sun and the Moon to see the bigger picture. This is where the Aquarian gets to shine. They know how to pull back and see all that is at play, all the aspects and how they fit together, and also how they can all move together into the future in a collective way. The Aquarians really are brilliant visionaries, often great humanitarians, and caretakers of the collective. They can bring us together and help us to work together. 

This is really important if you think about what has been coming up since last Fall, as we surface our own dark and split, we can see where we are divided, both in our personal lives but also in politics. I have had lots of conversations with people who are asking the question of - Now what? I can see people who are getting stuck in the loop of shock and upset, but don't necessarily know how to get out of the specifics to see the greater view and look ahead at where we need to go with all this. This is what the energy of Aquarius can help you do. I can't tell you what that direction is, it is up to you to find the answer for yourself, based on your heart, your gifts, you specific abilities. We all have a responsibility right now, both within ourselves and out in the world, and we must move forward together, but the ways in which we do this don't need to be the same. This is where you get to tap into your unique talent, or quality that makes you special and needed in this moment.

Don't get stuck in the specifics. The triggers. The reactions. It's a time to pull back and respond in a bigger way to move forward into an energy that is greater than where we are right now. Aquarius is about freedom! How do we each create a feeling a freedom that isn't just about the individual, but that includes the collective?








photo by Claire Cottrell, Jan 21, 2017

1.18.2017

mineral meditation








Please join me for a Breathwork Meditation.

This is part of a series of Mineral Meditations. This month we will focus on LEPIDOLITE. 
You will get a mineral of your own to work with and take home with you. During the circle we will talk all about this very special mineral: how to clean and care for it, you'll learn about its specific energy and properties, and you will get the opportunity to experience its healing qualities during our meditation. 

Saturday, January 28th
10:00 am - 12:15 pm
Venice, CA
$45

The location will be emailed to you when you RSVP.
Space is limited / To reserve your space please email :
lauren@fieldsofstudy.com




1.11.2017

full moon // december









FULL MOON






Wolf Moon
Thursday, January 12th, Cancer, 3:34 am PST

Oh, how I love the sign of Cancer. As a water sign myself, I feel such a connection to the sign of Cancer, it helps keep me open, optimistic, and loving in a nurturing way as a Scorpio. Cancer is the archetype of the Mother, the one who nurtures and protects, guides and nourishes (the triggered Cancer can often have a hard shell or reactive claws). This sign is the only one in the zodiac ruled by the Moon, and just as the moon does in its cycles, this sign can wax and wane with emotion, like the tide as it swells and retreats. Being in this full moon of Cancer you can bet that you will feel watery and receptive. Just as the water flows in a river - around the rock, around the bend - this sign knows how to adapt to its circumstances, while reading the environment, it is awake and open to its surroundings. This is partly what helps the Cancer be able to read people and what makes them a bit psychic; they pick up on energy, often absorbing it like a sponge to process and understand themselves and others better. Their motto : I feel therefore I am. They know how to read what you need without asking, they know how to nurture and provide whatever is needed to make you feel safe and protected, understood and loved. They are also very connected to their homes, their roots and their ancestors. Don't be surprised if you are feeling a lot of emotion arise around this full moon, are feeling extra sensitive, or even feeling the need to connect more to your home and your community. You could also feel the flip side, feeling challenged and triggered in these areas (don't retreat inwards!). Most likely if that is the case it means your soul is trying to point you to an area that needs healing. It is trying to show you a place where you might be off balance or need clearing to come back into a healthy alignment. 

We are also in a very special time where no planets are retrograding! That is very rare. And it means that there is space for things to surface, things that need healing. And it's not that they are surfacing because they are being triggered (which is what a retrograde does, it pushes things up by creating more of a split), most likely it will feel as if they are just floating to the surface to be released. The difficulty will only come if you resist letting them go, either out of wanting to hold on or wanting to repress. So, be aware as things come up - ask yourself if it is something that you just have to surrender to - an energy that is clearing itself. 

I still feel we are in a time of facing in ourselves things that have been repressed, things we judge, hide, fear... you can see it on the planet happening all around. This same thing is happening within us. There was an opening on the 21st, a new energy that has been activated and it is helping us connect more to the feminine wisdom of the Mother earth, and with this Cancer moon in the mix it will be such a help. Now as darkness arises the energy of the moon will help you more easily connect to the wisdom of the female (in men and women, this energy exists in every human), an energy that will help you say No to the dark with the compassion and love for your true self and the true self of the other. This No comes without judgment or separation. 

Stay connected to your heart. Try to find some kind of grounding practice so you don't get swept away with the tide of emotion. Have compassion for yourself and others. Use your heightened sensitivity and intuition to feel into the deeper layer of your experience and the experience of others. This will help you know what the situation needs - to create comfort, healing, compassion and openness of the heart. 

I also keep getting the feeling that touch is so important now - that the body is so open, sensitive and receptive to touch. Tune into your skin and the energy it can receive or read from those who touch it. See what energy is in your hands to give in return. To feel is one of the gifts of being human.








Robert Barry, Untitled. 1976

1.01.2017

a new year






May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. May your rivers flow without end, meandering through pastoral valleys tinkling with bells, past temples and castles and poets' towers into a dark primeval forest where tigers belch and monkeys howl, through miasmal and mysterious swamps and down into a desert of red rock, blue mesas, domes and pinnacles and grottos of endless stone, and down again into a deep vast ancient unknown chasm where bars of sunlight blaze on profiled cliffs, where deer walk across the white sand beaches, where storms come and go as lightning clangs upon the high crags, where something strange and more beautiful and more full of wonder than your deepest dreams waits for you—beyond the next turning of the canyon walls.



Benediction by Edward Abbey







Haris Epaminonda, Chapters, 2013

12.27.2016

new moon / december











NEW MOON






Night Long Moon
Wednesday, December 28th, Capricorn, 10:53 pm PST

The last few nights I have seen Venus shining brightly in the sky, calling me to find more beauty, open to new pleasures, and connect to how lovely it is to be human. Venus helps us to find peace, and with all that is going on on our planet, in our political system, and even in our personal lives, peace is needed. But, I really think it is so much deeper than that right now. I think we are being called to find a peace within. A peace between our own dark and light. We can see it so clearly on the planet, but it is just a reflection of what is happening within, and that is often harder to see because, well... it just doesn't feel good to admit that we have the same kind of darkness in one form or another. 

We have just come through a time of darkness, with Scorpio and the Winter Solstice giving us both opportunities and pause to look at our own dark, and our relationship to it. Exposing it is of such importance. JUST by allowing it to come to the surface you take power away from it, you make it harder for it to control you. And remember that when transformed that darkness is power! Allow the parts of you that have resistance, judgment and even blindness to your dark to make peace with the fact that it's there. It's not who you are, but merely an aspect. You are human, to be human means to have darkness. And it is a gift to be human,  to have experiences, it's the only way our soul can evolve.

I think we are coming out of two to three months of witnessing darkness in a big way and we are now in a time of being really honest about it. Almost every friend of mine is going through something big right now. And I keep encouraging them to be honest. To take responsibility of what they are feeling, but to be really honest about it, with themselves and with others. So many things are rearranging themselves, and we must learn to adjust to the ways we are growing. And it seems that things and people are growing at different rates, which can be hard (some things even feel like they are going backwards, and also swinging too far to the other side like a pendulum). The only way to get through it in an empowered and meaningful way that will allow for growth and for breakthroughs is to be honest. I'm scared. I'm hurt. I'm angry. You have to speak up! Speak the things you are feeling out loud! And practice doing this in a way where you own them, honor them, but know you are so much bigger than them.


As the year comes to a close and a new one is about to begin it's a natural time of reflection and looking ahead. I'm not one for intention setting or resolutions. BUT, I do think something worth doing is to feel into the changes that are already working on you. What is being birthed in you? What new energy are you moving into? How is this different than where you have been most of your life? Who are you?
Who are you becoming? 


Spend a little time in meditation, connecting deeply, use your imagination to feel into the energy that is stirring within you, and see if you can use your intuition to feel into the energy you are moving into! It feels powerful and exciting, I can feel it right now as I write this!

This is the last moon writing for 2016, and I just want to say thank you. Thank you for showing up to read this. I have been writing it for over four years and it's funny as I don't know who you are or how many you are, but I sit down to write these every new and full moon in good faith that it is of some importance, of some help, even if just for myself. Wishing you nothing but extraordinary things for 2017, a life beyond anything you could have imagined for yourself!









Yohji Yamamoto and I can't remember

12.14.2016

moon list












I had the honor of doing a Moon List for my friend Leigh Patterson

You can read the whole thing here.




creative act:

I was only in the studio the first week of this month. The rest has been spent traveling and visiting family in Europe. I went to the Wallace Collection the other day in London. I remembered how important it is for me as an artist to walk around a museum alone and in silence. Especially one with art that predates the 1900’s. I got so inspired by a myriad of things that excite me about getting back to work when I get home. Things like how the chain that hangs the paintings from the celling looks against the dusty blue silk wallpaper, the contrasting marbles, seeing paintings in person that I wrote about in Graduate School, or looking for an abnormally long time at how the fur of a dead deer was painted. 

I just got so excited about Painting (with a capital P), about what it can do and about what it means to be a painter now in relationship to its history. I remembered how having the space to look and think can be a huge part of creativity.  






Knoll stacking stools, on the set of Heart of Glass - Werner Herzog hypnotizing his actors