5.15.2018

new moon / may







NEW MOON





Planting Moon
Tuesday, May 15th, Taurus, 4:47 am PST

With New Moons we get a pause, a moment where there is an opening, a gift of reprieve. This is a time where what we have been avoiding is RIGHT in our face - unavoidable and inescapable. But with this New Moon we get an opening of energy that comes in to support us in all the big shifts and changes that are happening. Yes, it is a very hard time, but it is also a magical time.

I will share, that personally, I feel big shifts trying to happen. Emphasis on the word trying, or rather they are happening within me and I am becoming acutely aware of the ways I am trying to stay in the old. This could be part of my fixed Scorpio nature, always wanting something to overcome, some challenge to be up against, some energy to transform. In a way it's terrifying to not have something to overcome and transform, and yet that is the place I feel I am being pushed to be in. A place where there is ease, calm, support, confidence in my bodies ability to handle things, health, partnership, abundance... being. And oh boy! Do I feel myself fighting it, even though it's everything I have been fighting to have! This is the ironic and hard part about where I feel like we are right now. We are actually getting pushed into a place where we have worked so hard to be and we are resisting it and fighting it every step of the way.

With this New Moon in Taurus and Uranus moving to the sign of Taurus (for the next seven years) we are being pushed to realign ourselves into some more positive energy and positive values. But what I see happening is we are being faced with all of our issues and all the ways we hang on, stay comfortable in the known (even if those ways are more difficult). We have an attachment to them and right now we don't want to let go! So while we are facing some of our deepest issues and patterns, with this New Moon we are also being given messages and signs about the way through. It's like finding a secret doorway in a room where you have been keeping yourself trapped. This New Moon is guiding all of us to find that secret door that we didn't know was there. It's so important to keep your eyes, ears, hearts, bodies open right now. Pay attention to things you see in repetition, people you keep running into, dreams you keep having, animals that keep showing up... anything where you notice a sequence. I am a big believer in the message of threes. The first time you encounter something/one, the second time could be a coincidence, but the third is a message not to be ignored. Follow these things right now - they are here to guide you through your big lessons and allow you to settle into and be open to what is shifting inside you. 

Try to think about the fact that you are the room, the secret door AND the key. 


Taurus energy is all about value, beauty, pleasure. Be sure to partake in things that stimulate your senses, that feel sensual and nurturing. In fact, these kinds of things just might be the key to opening that secret door. Just make sure that this energy isn't indulgent or feeding the old patterns and issues, but instead is a way through, is full of healing, and is supporting the new place you are being pushed to step into. And be sure you aren't using the energy of Taurus to escape the difficulty. You will be able to feel it - is it keeping you in the old, are you using it to escape, OR is it leading you through something into something new?

What would it be like to not react to our issues from our ego, from the known, from our minds wanting to figure it out, from fear... but instead to face our issues from a place of openness, curiosity, trusting, surrendering to the universe to be guided through that energy?

Keep me posted. 







Lesley Vance ~ Untitled, 2011

listening & opinions








PODCAST


Episode 1

Q&A - Answering your questions about breathwork, self growth, creativity and minerals. In this episode I talk about how I came to breathwork, breathwork and manifestation, “who’s doing the answering”, being in the unknown, the difference between being inspired and copying, nurturing your creative voice, how minerals work, and minerals for the bath. 

listen here



Before the podcast I did a live feed on Instagram with a few books I am reading that I would recommend. 
If you missed it, or want to reference them, here they are.

She: Understanding Feminine Psychology 
by Robert A. Johnson

The Enneagram: Understanding Yourself and the Others In Your Life 
by Helen Palmer 

Your Soul's Plan: Discovering the Real Meaning of the Life You Planned Before You Were Born 
by Robert Schwartz 

Medical Medium Life-Changing Foods 
by Anthony William

The Secret Lives of Color 
by Kassia St Clair 

Reflections: Van Eyck and the Pre-Raphaelites 
by Alison Smith 

Mystical Symbolism: The Salon de la Rose+Croix in Paris, 1892–1897 
by Vivien Greene and Jean-David Jumeau-Lafond






Isamu Noguchi, "Jack in the Box", 1984

4.29.2018

full moon / april







FULL MOON





Grass Moon
Sunday, April 29th, Scorpio, 5:58 pm PST

A close friend who is an incredible astrologer and all around wise man informed me that Saturn has gone into retrograde on April 17th, until September. "This will make for an interesting summer", he said. Those of you who have gone through your first Saturn return know that Saturn brings with it some big changes and hard lessons. While this planet is retrograding in the sign of Capricorn it will make sure that whatever lesson we have not faced will be unavoidable. This will make for a rough season until it goes direct.

This also seems to come at a time where with this Full Moon in Scorpio brings what has been suppressed, repressed, hidden, avoided, etc... to the surface. I don't know if you feel it, but I really have felt so confronted by my own issues. Being a Scorpio myself I love its energy, but it's rough right now. The good news is that all of this is in service to us becoming more whole. That's one of the amazing things about Scorpio, all of the death, letting go, surfacing of the dark, is in the name of truth and transformation. That is what Scorpios do best. But be careful, because the unhealthy side of Scorpio is that because they aren't afraid to look at the dark or feel the pain or see the s%*t they tend to be drawn to those things too much, or want to just stay in that energy when it isn't appropriate. As my teacher said recently (she's a Scorpio too), "Oh, I have one foot in the s%*t, I might as well put the other one there too." Use the magic and mystery of the Scorpio to keep you fluid and curious through this process, so you don't get stuck in the muck. But also be aware to not further avoid the issue at hand, otherwise you will have an even ruder awakening soon to come.

If you don't know what lessons Saturn and the Scorpio energy are bringing you. Just pay attention to any patterns you see happening in your life, around you and within you. What feels like it's everywhere you look? What feels challenging or like it's difficult because it feels like an old way of being? Your soul is ready to grow right now - times 100. So it will insure that whatever you have not faced inside yourself is everywhere you look outside of you. It will mirror your internal dynamic externally.

Don't avoid what is coming to the surface. Things come to the surface to be healed and transformed. It's a difficult time. No doubt. And right now it feels relentless. Like you can't have a break. Stay aware. In every moment there is an opportunity for growth. Just remember that. ;)







Anish Kapoor, "Building for a Void", 1992 

4.15.2018

new moon / april








NEW MOON





Egg Moon
Sunday, April 15th, Aries, 6:58 pm PST

I have been writing these for about seven years now, two times a month. It started because I have always loved the moon since I was a kid and I wanted to understand on a deeper level how it was effecting me. My process over the years has developed into something so simple and yet so powerful for me. Around the time of the New or Full moon I just sit down at my computer an check in with myself. I ask myself what shifts I have felt, what I am going through, what have I heard others talking about - is there a theme, and I use my intuition about what I feel is headed our way. I have never read an astrology book or taken a class. But I instead just ask myself - What is going on? Over the years what I have observed has taught me about different energies, different signs, as well as the ebb and flow and how it affects us. And then I sit down to write for an hour and whatever comes out comes out. No editing, no research. Done.

This process has forced me to trust myself. I really feel that my commitment to going deeper has allowed me to be in touch with some sort of wisdom or energy that I feel I channel when I write these. I try to walk the line of knowing that there is something coming through me, a wisdom I can not take credit for, but I still try to honor and own my ability let it come through freely and be the vehicle that translates it for you all. 

All of this to say that this month I am asking you to strengthen this skill in yourself. If I can do it, you can do it. It really is about committing, listening and trusting. 

I have had a hell of a week and a full weekend intensive workshop with my teacher, and am so burnt out I don't have much to give. So, I am cutting myself some slack and asking you to tune in to yourself, others, your surroundings - the universe above you and within you. Start somewhere. Just ask yourself those questions above and see what you come up with. If you feel brave (which is like 99% of developing this skill) I ask that you share what you come up with in the comments. 

Thank you to all who support this practice, those of you who are new and those who have read these since the beginning. Please start to spread and share these posts with others. I feel it is time these grew to reach the next level of readers. 
I will be back in full force for the Full Moon in two weeks.

Happy New Moon to you!






Pierre Huyghe, "Liegender Frauenakt (Untilled)," 2011–12

3.31.2018

full moon / march




FULL MOON





Sap Moon
Saturday, March 31st, Libra, 5:37 am PST

There is a lot of intensity in the air with this Blue Full Moon in Libra, our second Full Moon this month. Though our moon is in the more feminine sign of Libra, we have it reflecting the full light of our sun in Aries. AND we have Mercury retrograding in the sign of Aries. So there is lots of Aries energy in the air. I have been feeling more of the Aries this last week and a half than I have the Libra energy, but we can learn to use the energy of Libra to help up get more into balance. 

I don't want to imply that part of our work is to always be getting out of the energy we are in. Sometimes the answer is to stay. To stay in the energy or emotion even if it is uncomfortable. To not try to escape every uncomfortable moment or feeling. But, because the cosmos present us with constant opportunities for growth and astrological oppositional energies in which to do that it's good to learn how to access other energies to achieve more balance. And since we are in Libra, as stated above, balance is the name of the game right now.

With the Sun in Aries and the Moon in Libra we are really in a time of a one to one reflection of self (Aries) and other (Libra). It is why right now you might feel so much is being brought to the surface in your relationships, intimate, friendships, co-workers, etc... Our relationships with others mirror our relationship to ourselves. And with this retrograde it is a time of things rearranging themselves. We all know the surface information about Mercury in retrograde: breakdowns in communication, language, technology, etc... Mercury in retrograde has a bad wrap. But it is such a useful time as it breaks down what has been, to reveal what is ready to be. It is the cosmic earthquake that allows old ways of thinking and being to fall away so that something more true and in alignment with who you are now can emerge. Where retrogrades are not fun is if you resist this shakedown and where the retrograde is trying to move you. You have to surrender to where it is pushing you. You can not hold on to the old energy or it will become a very painful time. Imagine if you were trying to fit into the same size shoe you wore when you were 7. Not gonna happen. Time to move forward. You aren't not that size any more, you have grown. Accept it.

Times of growth can be really uncomfortable. But, try as much as you can to surrender to what is trying to reshape itself in your life.

Now on to balance. With all this Aries energy in the air things have been a little (or a lot) volatile. Aries is a fire sign and it feels like right now we are in the unhealthy version of fire, which is: irritation, anger, having a short fuse, judgment, impatience, etc... If you have felt these things in yourself or witnessed them in your relationships you are not alone. We can use the Libra Moon energy right now to help. Libra is all about harmony, peace and beauty. Spend time doing anything you can right now to cultivate those feelings in your life. Spending time in nature just being, noticing the simple beauty of something you encounter, slowing down and creating space in your life to feel more peace and stillness, meditate, rest, bringing in elements of beauty into your home, etc... This will help bring in to balance all of that Aries fire.









Rebecca Horn, Mechanical Bodyfan 1973–4


3.16.2018

new moon / march








NEW MOON





Sap Moon
Saturday, March 17th, Pisces, 6:11 am PST

Whoa! What a two weeks! I don't know if you have felt it but it seems everyone I have been talking to, interacting with, listening to, helping, etc... has had a very difficult two weeks. I wish I could tell you why. I don't have an answer. The only thing I can offer is that it is a time to stay in our hearts, and cultivate our compassion, towards ourselves and others. It has been a heated two weeks, lots of emotions washing over us during this watery time in Pisces. We can use the energy of this sign to help us stay compassionate and empathetic to what we are going through, and what those around us are going through. Remember, we are all being put through the ringer right now. So when you feel triggered, take some deep breaths and connect to your heart. When you feel you are triggering someone else, take the time to talk it through and work it out in the moment calmly and open. When you see someone else being triggered, support them, find the empathic stance to take with them to help guide them through it, or just see their point of view (even if it is different from yours).

This watery time of Pisces has a lot of people leaking their emotions all over the place. It's a time to learn to hold them, own them, and use our intuition to navigate the waters that are rising within us. Take responsibility for what you are feeling, in responsibility there is power and freedom. 

Also, Chiron is traveling in this Pisces Moon and Sun. If you don't know about Chiron I would look it up, read what it's about, and look at your chart and see where your Chiron is. Chiron is the wounded healer. Whatever house it is in is one of the wounds you must learn to own and overcome in this lifetime. Wounds are not meant to be healed by others, only ourselves. And right now it seems that this particular wound is being triggered - big time. When it is triggered it is up to us to do the healing, not the responsibility of the other person. Our wound in Chiron can be a gift at times, and a curse in others. I always try to keep an eye on mine, see how I am using it incorrectly, when I am coming from it and I shouldn't be, or seeing something falsely through its lense. 

Stay connected to your heart, have compassion, use your intuition, own your emotions. We are moving from the water feminine energy into male active fire. So hang on!







Rock-crystal ovoid vessel with wide mouth, Rock crystal, Greek, Eastern Mediterranean



2.28.2018

full moon / march







FULL MOON





Sap Moon
Thursday, March 1st, Virgo, 4:51 pm PST

Boy, oh boy. This full moon has already got us on a roller coaster ride. This one is strongly pulling us into extreme emotional reactions (emphasis on the word reactions). If you notice this in yourself and in others there's not much you can do to not be under its effect. But, the good news is just as quickly as you swing to your emotional peaks it means you can just as easily get yourself unstuck and more grounded. The Pisces Sun really helps us out with this. If you feel like you are losing it, way down in the dumps, or boiling over with anger the best way to knock yourself back into alignment is by getting creative. This Pisces Sun brings with it the energy of play, creativity, joy, lightness and fun. Get outside, take a hike, put on fun music, get into the studio and make something

This Virgo moon will help keep your feet on the ground, practical, and allow you to see the steps you need to take to get you to where you want to be. But, Pisces will make the journey getting there so much more fun. I can't stress being creative enough right now. Sometimes creativity just means problem solving in a creative way, thinking outside the box, or seeing something from a new perspective.

Not only do we have the Sun in Pisces but we also have about six other planets and celestial forces in this playful water sign. So don't let your emotional swings keep you down. Pisces will allow you to have movement, inspiration and motion. This can be especially helpful as we are focused on day to day practical living: how we spend our time, how we organize our home, how we take care of ourselves, ways we are of service, etc... Pisces is great energy to help shake that up, to help you recommit to focusing on the day to day in a way that feels fun, fulfilling and inspired. While Virgo can help get rid of the clutter, literally and physically, you will have ease this next week with knowing what to eliminate to help streamline your life. There is plenty of opportunity for more balance and positivity right now, you just have to choose it. 







Gabriel Kuri,  "Attempt 1 to arrest the flow from even A to event B",  2018

2.15.2018

new moon / february








NEW MOON 




Wolf Moon
Thursday, February 15th, Aquarius, 1:05 pm PST

With this New Moon we also get a partial solar eclipse here in North America. No matter where you are, even if you can't see it, we are all affected by the energy of an eclipse. New Moons are void of any light, and are natural resting points. In the month of February there is no Full Moon, as January had it's blue moon at the end of the month, and the next Full Moon on March 1st. So we are really getting a lot of space right now. Add to the mix that this New Moon is in the sign of Aquarius, an Air sign that has a spacious and detached quality to it. We are really in a time where we can use this energy to pause and reflect, to feel the space around us, to have perspective, and see the bigger picture. If you are in the middle of a conflict right now, or stuck about making a decision, use this energy to help you step back and look at all the components. Aquarians tend to stay in the mind, given that it is an Air sign, use the space of Air to give you a wider perspective. But also drop down into the heart as much as you can, so to make any forward movement from the truth of your heart. 

Aquarians are not concerned with the personal, so it's a great time to develop or have an intention for the greater good in mind. They are visionaries and incredible thinkers when it comes to ideas that affect the collective. But it is harder for them to connect to the personal. If you notice right now that it is harder to connect to your needs and feelings or those of others that is ok, this will shift. Use this time to be in the spaciousness of air. To feel the expanse and freedom that is available to you. It is also a time where you will feel the support of others more than usual, support from your community, even spirit or universal energy helping to hold you up and guide you. 

The eclipse energy is a little more tricky, it doesn't have the ease of Aquarius, though it might appear to. If you think about the Sun as masculine, and the Moon as feminine, then during a solar eclipse the Earth (you) moves in between the Sun and Moon. So ask yourself - How are you, in your own life, not allowing your own Male and Female to come together with in you? No matter if you are male or female, we have both energies working inside us. And all they want to do is come together in wholeness - but we have lots and lots of ways we keep them apart. Though each are personal to us and to our soul, since we are in Aquarian energy I would ask specifically about the ways you might use space, detachment, distancing, the need for freedom and autonomy, etc... to keep your inner male and female from merging. And if you are in a relationship you can see your relationship as an outward reflection of what you (your Male and Female) are doing internally. So, wherever you and your partner are not coming together, wherever or whenever you detach or disconnect, this is a reflection of what you are doing internally with yourself. For Air signs they will often think they are connected to the personal even when they aren't - they tend to lean more towards the energy of Spirit, which is a Yes energy. So things that feel positive, uplifting and comfortable are favorable even when these activities or ways of thinking leave out part of the truth. All this to say that as you reflect on the ways you use the energy of Aquarius to stay disconnected, it might mean that some of those ways actually make you feel good! and yet do not have a good result. Which is a way to trick yourself. So, really look hard and deep. Be a good and truthful detective.

This new moon is an incredible time of reflection, creative ideas, support, clearer perspective and space. 








ceramics by HANS COPER

2.07.2018

from around












- flipping out over this show (pictured above)

- have you heard of Connie Convers? She is new to me. A lovely little write up about her in the New Yorker. Check her music out. 

- while working on a drawing last month I got deep into the Dear Sugar Radio podcast, and loved this one to teenagers - I highly recommend. 

- digging this video

- two really amazing music mixes - one - two (thank you SB) - oh and this album

- if you haven't read this incredible interview with Emilie Halpern - you are missing out. I was lucky enough to introduce this dear friend to Apiece Apart, and to style her for this shoot. Her interview is so moving and inspiring. And the beautiful photos of Em are by bff Claire Cottrell. Check it out!

- a great great interview with Lucy Grealy

- a really good PBS series on the Bronte sisters

- the thoughts of Oliver Sacks in the last months of his life

- an interesting article on women and anxiety

- are you an empath? I am - reading Dr. Orloff's book. Here is a great podcast with her here

- I love Dorothy Kilgallen - she had a very interesting and mysterious death that is linked to JFK's assassination - been reading about her lately - here and here

- just redid my dear friends website! Lara Elliott Healing

- Goddess of Creation - this is one of my all time favorite modern SNL skits - been rewatching - laughing so hard - sent to me originally by my brother who said it reminded him of me in art school - there was always one of these girls around (eye roll). Enjoy.

- if you live in LA I hope you got to see the Sarah Charlesworth show at LACMA (closed on the 4th), I am a huge fan - I also stopped into this show and was totally into it

- got to hear one of my favorite artists, Vija Celmins, speak at Art Center (where i went for undergrad and grad) a few weeks ago - can't wait to see her show this weekend









1.31.2018

full moon / january







FULL MOON





Wolf Moon
Wednesday, January 31st, Leo, 5:27 am PST

The gift of a Super Blue Blood Moon!
This is the first Blue Moon Total Lunar Eclipse in 152 years! The last one happened March 31st, 1866.
This special moon is one with a lot of facets and layers. It is a rare moon that is here to help us see the breakthroughs that are happening within us right now. With their bright light, full moons are great for helping to illuminate the things we are ready to see. Pay attention to what is being shown to you, especially if it something that is reoccurring. After all, a blue moon is the name given to a full moon that appears twice in one month. Keep your eyes peeled for themes that emerge. Pay particular attention to anything that happens in threes; the first is pure experience that has an impact, the second is to get your attention, and the third is a conformation. With this full moon in Leo themes might emerge about independence, freedom, creativity, passion, being a leader, play, or recognition.

Full moons are usually quite intense with the sun and moon in opposing signs. But the dynamic between the two is heightened during a full moon lunar eclipse, as the Earth moves directly in between the sun and moon. Because we are on Earth we will feel the dynamic between these two opposing signs even more as we are literally right in between them. This month the moon is in Leo and the sun in Aquarius. Both of these signs want freedom, independence, and autonomy - they really have to do with individuality. Don't be surprised if you feel a pulling away from the pack, or a need to separate yourself. Just be aware of how you are doing this - is it because you are building more of the self and moving in a direction that is in alignment with who you are, or is it a separation based on rejection? Pay attention. Again, the light of the full moon will show you how these two signs play out within you. Aquarius being an air sign, can bring a clarity of vision, the future and the big picture, though often detached and unemotional. And Leo brings the fire, passion, heart, the personal, but beware that this expression doesn't become indulgent or a need for attention. How are these two energies working within you?

With this Leo energy during the eclipse it might also bring up old (or new) heartbreak. An eclipse is a collective quickening - it pushes us into new energy. But with this lunar eclipse in the sign of Leo it could bring up some wounds of the heart, the good news is that there is energy to be used right now for deep healing and letting go. Or you might feel the Aquarius holding you back from getting in touch with these emotions. Again, an intense time full of many dynamics - so look closely and try your best to unpack what is going on inside you. When in doubt, just ask. I do this a lot, if I am unclear about something I ask for my second or third dot to connect and confirm. 

I don't know about you, but I sure feel the fire under me right now. Those seeds you planted over winter are starting to sprout and grow - use this moon as added fuel to the fire. No doubt there is something in you that is ready to burst through the soil and make its way into the light. 









image from @imrevolting